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  • BTW: I had a live liver transplant and certainly didn't have survivors guilt. But for quite a while I felt like a transplant victim rather than a transplant survivor.

    These are difficult times for everyone I know. For me, the best thing is to get outside in the fresh air and move. Read uplifting books, get your head out of the internet and breathe. Also, if you have a creative outlet, this is a good time to use it. Good luck.

  • Recently I've been hearing more and more about personality changes caused by anesthesia, especially in older people. Not sure if that's your problem but it's possible.

  • Yes,  I occasionally have the blues which is a more recent problem. I fought to keep them from giving me anti-depressives at first. I've always been able to control my feelings. But I am now 70 y/o, in October will be 18 years from my transplant. Most of my friends have died or moved. All my doctors are now retired and I have issues with my current transplant doctors. I am getting too old to travel the SLC from Arizona just to say hi. I am stable and no real need to see them. It cost me almost 2K every time I go up there and the VA refuses to help with expenses even though I am a 100% Disabled Veteran, Service Connected. So I am looking into seeing other transplant doctors. I will probably try St Joe's Liver Transplant Center in Phoenix. But the constant fatigue and a hot summer has kept my activities down which is contributing to my depression issues. I am a very positive person an active so this is new to me . I just try and stay positive. Things do get better the farther you are out. I'll keep you in my prayers.  

  • I am celebrating my 3 month anniversary today!! I feel more energetic and stronger each month, however, I do have my "blue days". I never thought of it as depression because I just felt useless and lonely but happy to be alive. I agree with one of the other replies, I give thanks to my relationship with God and talking to Him everyday, showing my gratitude in everything I do and wait on His time to reveal my path and His will for the rest of my life.
    Are you depressed ver day all the time? Or is it occasionally, if so try to see what triggers it and work on removing those triggers! Some drugs can help but they can also be addictive so extreme care needs to be taken.
    I will add you to my prayer list and hope your pain lessens!
  • thanks barb. i used to feel i was the only one who felt that way about survivors guilt.thanknthe lord that feeling has still in pain.its my mouth that seems to be reacting to the taco big sure its s/effects..but its very panfull. it desnt surprise me that you had physian errors.a lot of tx people have suffered due to mess ups.but we are still get fed up with people saying keep positive.if being positive worked there would be no need for prayer.for me praying is the most positive thing that works for of health to you barb                                                                                                                                                            bill

  • William, I have experienced the same thing, survivor guilt, two transplant errors due physician errors that almost cost my life and long unendurable pain without a voice they would respond to plus lack of sleep. What has helped me is sleeping pills (ugh!) and a strong water soluble vitamins, ordered as over the counter vit are not soluable, on the whole. Feel so much better, finally. God bless your journey.
  • hi kathy. can relate to your nnearly a yr post liver tx.for the first 6months i had depression big time. i had been down before but this was a different ball game.never in my life have i ever been so low. suicide was  areal thing to do at that time to stop the pain of my mind.there i was a new liver my life spared and me feeling so low i wanted to die.on top of that i was consumed with  survivors was terrible.all the drs were doing was throwing anti depression pills at me.i thank the lord i never took them.(not that im against them at all) but i did come out of that deep pit of still not really up and happy clappy and have some really down days but nothing compared to where i was.i know i am still in early days of the whole event of heart goes out to you kathy. i hope you will get a lot brighter..god bless you                BILL

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